My Biggest Fear

I guess I have a lot of fears.  Probably something happening to one of my kids or a close family member is one of the biggest.  But the greatest fear I have, by far, is to think that my children will reject the Lord.  If I think about it too much, I get very worried.  I don't think there's anything I try harder to do than searching for opportunities to fit in something about God.  In my conversations with Samuel, I'm always looking for something to say to help him see Jesus.  I read a really funny story one time in a parenting book.  It told of a mom who was always looking for opportunities to share these great and wonderful truths about God with her son.  She was SO excited at this chance she had to go to an Easter play with him.  She just KNEW that during this play, they would see Jesus doing miraculous things and showing His great power, and her son would be SURE to ask questions about Jesus, and she would have an awesome chance to share Christ with him in a meaningful way.  Just as Jesus was calming the terrible storm, her son leaned over to her to whisper in her ear.  She was just SURE that this was HER moment...but instead of asking ANYTHING spiritual, he asked, "Mom, how do they make the water look so real?"  She had built up this perfect scenario in her mind, only to be disappointed in the end.  This is exactly what happens to me all the time.  I know Sam is only 3, but I get myself feeling so sure that we're going to have a really special talk about God, but inevitably it ends up rabbit trailing and becoming a talk about what we're going to have for breakfast the next day or something! =/  As I was reading a friend's post the other day, I was reminded of something that I knew but I needed to start putting into practice.  My children's decision to follow/or not follow Christ is fully dependent on the Holy Spirit.  Am I trusting them to Him, or am I trying to manufacture this love for God in them?  Does anybody else struggle with this?  I do the same thing in my friendships with unbelievers.  The friendships that I have made for the purpose of being the "light of the world," like we're commanded to be in Matthew 5.  But I always end up frustrating myself with my lack of ability to relax and just let it come naturally.